42

ism to make them say “Mamma!”?”—
into a figure of Caesar Borgia, as well
as into one of Al Jolson. In another
corner a handsome mare was drinking
whole bottles of different kinds of
wine,” while two others were hanging
up the bottles by their necks to hooks
in the wall.”

“Come upstairs,” whispered Doctor
S. As I dazedly followed him up the
ladder to the hay-loft, we were almost
knocked headlong by a frisky young
Houyhnhnm galloping down _ back-
wards.”

“One of our worst,” sighed the Doc-
tor, “but the saddest case of all is now
in Bedlam—a lovely young filly who
went out of her mind over big game
hunting.”

“Hunting? Lions and tigers?”

“Stallions—and mice!” he whis-
pered.

“Boo-o0-o0--nrmph!” came an eerie
neigh from a feed-room on our left.
Looking in, we saw a black-maned,
bay mare in a night-gown,” making
strange motions, while a lanky, white
filly took down learned notes.”

“Haunting . . . and Spiritualism,”
Doctor S. explained, and we passed
on to the main hay-loft. Here we
found two Houyhnhnms sitting en-
tranced before a white screen,” on
which a large-eared black mouse in
big-buttoned short trousers cut absurd
capers. A third Houyhnhnm was
neighing at the top of her high-
pitched voice that the picture was ter-
rible,” but no one paid any attention
to her. Two more, in a corner, were
arguing about the light, and about
the possibilities of using other colors
besides black and white in such dem-
onstrations of the rodential biped.

We departed hastily, and descend-
ed the ladder. But we had some dif-
ficulty in escaping to the outer air, for
the doorway was blocked by a neigh-

Ho de lal,

HONS (OS 194

PU AU PACE DEN evan din Ga Writ

20 @) EEE)

te fo as

22 Bi CanGs

lal, (Gp

4D. L. K. and M. G. M. (again the initials
are appropriate to the owner of such a
HOBBY. We begin to suspect the cor-
rectness of our author’s opening asser-
tion).

2J. B. B., who describes her mount as “‘De-
structive Criticism’’—a hard-mouthed
beast indeed.

2M. M. C. and C. M. D.





38

ing crowd of infuriated Houyhnhnms
attempting to exterminate a weak-
looking, loose-mouthed mare.

“Justice at last,” said the Doctor
grimly, as we evaded them. “That,”
he added, seeing the question in my
look, “is one who came most danger-
ously under your influence, having
just published A Sentimental Disserta-
tion On The Amorous Relations Of
The Houynhnms, And Remedies For
Difficulties Encountered.’

This was too much! I begged Doc-
tor S. to let me return to my Uncle
Toby and the Widow Wadman, Wal-
ter Shandy, and Obediah, and Cor-
poral Trim. The requisite permission
was granted, on my promising to re-
tract all my Opinions on HOBBY-
HORSES, and to write on that fertile
subject no more. This little pamphlet
is indeed but an _ Introduction—a
Preface—nay, a Dedication to the in-
estimable Doctor S.—of my five-vol-
ume work to come, on the evils of
riding HOBBIES. Peace to thy shade,
Doctor S.—and to the Houyhnhnms,
when they shall have perused and ab-
sorbed my coming endeavors—as I
wish to rest quietly in Shandy-Hall,
with my Uncle Toby smoking his pipe
by my study-fire.

SHANDY-HALL, 17—.

27 CLG: