“_-One Red Leaf, the Last of Its Clan--”
HUSH spread over the vast consultation room, and all the children stopped
fidgeting.
The President arose.
“We are gathered together,’’ she said, “to diagnose, and, if possible, to suggest
a remedy in the case of the lowest person in a class. Why should there be a lowest
person? The Dean and I have been discussing and investigating this matter, and
the Dean has a report she would like to read.”
The Dean arose and choked.
“Tn every class there has been a lowest person,” she began in a strained voice.
“This alone is unusual. In 1904 there was one from Philadelphia, and in 1912 there
was one with red hair’’—
Here she caught sight of the littlest Faculty sitting in the back row doing his
Harmony lesson. Startled at this inattention she sat down, covered with con-
fusion.
The President spoke. ‘‘Suppose we take the lowest one in this year’s class, for
example.”
One of the Faculty remarked threateningly, ‘‘Her mother is a friend of mine.’
“Let’s take the next one,’’ said the Dean, brightly.
“‘She has too much charm,”’ said the Star Vibrator, tapering off the ‘‘m”’.
“Oh, well, take anybody,” said the President.
“Take any one, take nine,” said the littlest Faculty, rapturously.
The Psychologist in the front row removed his glasses.
“T think,” he said, looking in Pillsbury’s Essentials of Psychology,” that there
is some trouble at the synapses between the associatory neurones.”
The youngest Faculty ventured a timid remark. “Umhmmmm. Maybe she
has no executive abiilty,’’ he said reminiscently.
The Philosopher, rousing a seapussy from his lap, placed his hand at his
waistline. ‘‘Maybe she has too much. She has obtained the greatest result with
the least effort.”
“What a fresh remark!’’ said the Musician.
“That's a solution,’’ said the President. ‘The trouble is that the lowest person
is too clever. And we can’t cure that. Shall we adjourn?”
And the audience kindly remained seated until the academic procession had
passed out of the building.
