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This Side of Malton
Rae: is the story of a failure which took place in the days when mind struggled

with matter and they found that there was a great deal the matter with

mind. It all happened inside of Dalton where Terror and Huff reign, and it
is for those who only know the building from this side that we tell the Tale, forever
a warning to those hapless ones who would penetrate its mysteries.

The Girl opened the door carelessly: she was unaffected and walked with a
Simple Harmonic Motion. As she stepped inside a sudden movement of the
ether made her notice a large Sine with a Co-sine right next to it: ““Everybody must
continue in a state of uniform motion in a straight line unless interrupted.” The
Girl felt frightened; some power stronger than her will was at work. All at once
she began to move; hours later she was still moving. She became first tired and
then exhausted, but on she went. The interruption came at last, for she came to
an abrupt halt as she fell down an inclined plane. She put out her lever arm to
steady herself and as she did so a tall man came up to her and said, “‘ Please take this
Quiz!” She remembered her Mother saying to her, “Every action produces an
equal and opposite reaction,” so she knocked him down and failed to take the Quiz.
The man had a certain Mechanical Advantage over her and she felt that she was in
his power, but she determined not to show her fear and began to conserve all her
energy until the right moment should arrive. The Man looked at her and took
her temperature, for he felt in a certain indefinable way that her Thermal Capacity
was not normal. “You have lost a degree,” he said; he looked worried and began
to get his apparatus ready. First he weighed her in air and then he weighed her in
water; he looked more worried than ever. ‘‘You have lost a great deal,” he
said gently.

The Girl looked at her watch; it had begun to go counter clock-wise and she
could not read it. Even a little watch was not safe here! She suddenly caught
sight of a Wheatstone Bridge. Release was in sight! She ran to it and jumped.
Nature frustrated her, for the current was too strong and she was washed ashore by
a sound wave. When she was herself again they forced a few calories of food down
her throat by means of a tuning fork. Under constant pressure she began to
expand; her resentment was reaching the fusion point. While the Man was
looking the other way she seized a piece of sealing wax, and having charged it by
rubbing it on her sleeve she touched his arm with the deadly weapon and instantly
electrocuted him.

Free once more, she was on the point of leaving the building when a Lion of
Force drove her into another room. Here she came face to face with Einstein.
There was a certain magnetism about him and unwillingly the Girl felt herself
impelled toward him. The great man looked at her. “My dear, it’s all relative
anyway,” he said, “‘so why worry! Now go! You are here and now discharged.”
Without stopping to thank him, with an accelerated velocity the Girl ran off and

shut the doors of Natural Science behind her forever. SERENA

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