158 THE BOOK OF THE CLASS OF NINETEEN-ELEVEN
OR
Tatlor-made and Taplor-matd
VERY year with unfailing regularity the English Department challenges the Fresh-
man with the question: What did you come to college for? and every year with unfailing
regularity the Freshman in the travail of her soul covers a sheet with an effusion which
is branded as sentimental, superficial or pedantic. Had the English Department a heart or
the Freshman a head this cruel mockery would have ceased long since. The answer is
simple; it is summed up in a single word, and woe to the student who does not learn it!
Nevertheless—a fact which the English Department fully realises—a Freshman driven to
death cannot discover this all-important truth until after the wave of receptions and
re-adjustments has subsided. In point of fact, we come to college for lectures. As someone
wisely remarked, the essential necessity of a college is its faculty. A college could
conceivably exist without students, without office, without library, without campus or
clubs or classes.. But a college without a faculty would be a hockey game without a team.
Now a faculty pre-supposes lectures.
So we find lectures the pivot on which the college turns. The office exists for the
purpose of superintending, the students for the purpose of attending, lectures; the campus
for the purpose of providing lecture-room, the library for the purpose of providing lecture
material. The day is divided, not into hours, but into periods; the week, not into days,
but into the portion of the toiler and week-ends; time itself is marked, not by years, but
