Page Your Murder | In The Mosque Continued from Page 3 rubbed his Van Dyke, and did an around-the-world with his yoyo. Deep in his thoughts, he started to hear the woman ask, “Would you like me to show you the people my husband was playing bridge with last night?” “Ah-ha!” the salugi cried, “A sore loser did it! Now we’re get- ting someplace!” The widow point- ed to three men in the group of twelve. One had blue eyes, one had brown eyes, and one had green eyes. The salugi ordered them searched, but none of them had any weapons on them. “One of you three is the murderer,” he proclaim- ed. “Who was El Cosmo’s part- ner?” The man with the blue eyes nodded. “Did you win?” The man nodded in the affirmative. “Then you’re OK. I arrest you two as partners in crime for the murder of El Cosmo, the leader of the Eastern Mohammedan world. It is my duty to warn you that any- thing you say will be held against you.” One muttered Betty Grable, one fainted. Quick as lightning, the ugis sprang into action. They brought in cameras, set up kleiz lights, clamped handcuffs on the two accused men, and revived the unconscious one with a bucket of water. “Talk,” snarled the salugi. Amid great noise, hundreds of Be- lievers had crowded into the mos- que, all wailing and pointing at the two men. The man with the blue eyes looked around him, amazed at the attention that the two were get- ting. Flashbulbs went off, news- reel cameras hummed, and an- nouncers canvassed the onlookers to get their opinions. Finally, he could stand it no longer, and shrieked “I did it! I did it. Give me'‘some attention too!” He reach- ed out, focused the cameras on himself, and clawed at the salugi’s uniform. “Yes, yes, F won last night,” he continued, “but I hated him. I kill- ed him. He’s been antagonizing me for years, and last night was the last straw. I had just bid and made a grand slam in no trump, and he said, ‘That’s all you Harvard men are good for, — Bridge!’ So I kill- ed him, and I’m glad of it!” He turned to the camera, smiling, and repeated, “I’m glad of it!” * * * The salugi stopped filing his nails long enough to smile benign- ly at the widow and answer her questions. “Oh, of course, I sensed it was the blue-eyed one all along. Once ran into a case something like his down in Java, a few years ago. The only reason I arrested the others was to get him to talk. Knew it was he all a long. Yes sir, knew it all the time.” The widow looked up admiringly at him, and murmured “How?” The salugi whispered almost in- audibly, “Yale, ’27.” We have that Extra Special Graduation Gift you are looking for RICHARD STOCKTON LANCASTER AVENUE THE COLLEGE NEWS Wednesday, May 17, 1950 Haverford Professor Will Speak to Seniors Continued from Page 1 Dr. Foss arrived at the Haver- ford Co-operative Workshop, where foreign teachers were being fam- iliarized with the United States, in 1940. He was discouraged due to unsuccessful financial ventures and found in the atmosphere of the Quaker college the spiritual “lift” he needed. He has been a teacher, judge, lawyer, lecturer, and busi- nessman but has maintained throughout his life a deep love for philosophy, which he is now teach- ing to Haverford and Bryn Mawr students. In 1948 he was elected Haverford’s favorite professor. Besides ‘the books he wrote in Germany, Dr. Foss has written two books in the philosophical vein since he came to America — The Idea of Perfection in the Western World and Symbol and Metaphor in Human Experience, which came out last fall. Dr. and Mrs. Foss have two sons, one of whom is studying and painting in Paris, and the other of whom is sched- uled to assist Leonard Bernstein in the instruction of orchestral conducting at Tanglewood this summer. Correspondent Deplores Fault-Finding Criticisms Continued from Page 2 Before I prove to be doing to the review exactly what I am complaining that the reviewer has done to the dance I shall close my letter with the plea that review- ers cease to devote their energies to finding the flaws in productions and allow themselves to feel the imipact of the performance as a whole. Sincerely, Alice Lattimore Rest Your Eyes! Have Some Hamburgers and French Fries AT HAMBURG HEARTH BRYN MAWR, PA. “The Captain’s Death Bed’’ and other essays BY VIRGINIA WOOLF AT THE Country Bookshop Opportunity in Business There are never enough Gibbs-trained secretaries to meet the persistent demand. Write College Course Dean for catalog Katharine Gibbs 230 Park Ave., NEW YORK 17 33 Plymouth St, MONTCLAIR i1 E. Superior St, CHICAGO 11 155 Angell St, PROVIDENCE 6 90 Marlborough St, BOSTON 16 When examinations make you blue, The College Inn is the place for you! THE COLLEGE INN Bard’s Eye View The Compleynt of an Ousted Senior or © Is an old hoop stick all I mean to you? Specially contributed by Anonymous, 50 We endure tne scornful stares With which our superior wisdom is met We are quite ready to share Our table with the rabble, and to let The Freshmen outstay us up late: ‘but the thing Most excerable, insolent and gall- ing Is when they view our room—the humble nook Where dreams and hidden things and an occasional book Have lain, our sacred room with a possessive look. Oh! They will put the bed right there, their curtains are too short, The walls will be the perfect color for the picture of the fort Is the closet roomy enough? there matting on the chair? They will change the window cush- ion—just as soon as we’re not there. I will let them pity us when the comprehensives come I will let them steal away all my special private stones I will let them find the tower Climb the trees, invade the bower Ring the bell and tame the birds But if they want to escape an is Philadelphia Inquirer, Flashlight Instrumental In Discovering Bone Carrier of Wyndham Roof ’ Continued from Page 1 Undiscouraged however, I went to another window; darkness and void. But suddenly, just as I was about to remove my nose from the screen, there leapt up at me out of the blackness a face! But such a face as I have never seen — pale and wild-and eerie! My knees turned to water, and the flashlight, shaken beyond endur- ance in my trembling hand, went out. After having yelled in panic for (a) a friend to come and com- fort me, and (b) another flash- light, I felt somewhat fortified. Somehow the flashlight got lit. and slowly and hesitatingly I shined it over the roof. The beam crept down to the left and back without exposing so much as a bottle of suntan oil. But sudden- ly, as the light began to spread to the night, there surged up out of the darkness, trembling with righteous indignation, an enor- mous and bristling raccoon. He sat and looked at us vindictively, and then, waving his tail, scooted atrocious kind of doom They’d better come to see ME when they come into my room. START SUMMER RIGHT WITH A CATALINA BATHING SUIT poyce lewis headfirst down a vine. We almost collapsed! That it was a raccoon who had been bring- ing those bones up onto Wynd- ham roof had never occurred to us. That’s when the fun began. Since then, our roof has been in- vaded, at all hours of the day, by men bent on catching the raccoon. They set a trap for it two nights ago, but the only thing that got caught in it was me, and that was quite by mistake. Last night at dinner the maid came in and solemnly announced that at 11:00 a man would be around to watch for the “animal,” and at about 11:15 we heard gunshots in the garden, but what happened nobody knows. We are still waiting, never knowing what new developments each day will bring forth in the mad adventures of Wyndham and the raccoon. ENGAGEMENT Bebe Bordman, ’50 to Townsend Scudder, Jr. Compliments of the Haverford Pharmacy Haverford 1930, Liocsrr & Myers Tosacco Co. | Theyre MULDERL Theyre TOPS fe At the University of Texas and Colleges os and Universities throughout the country CHESTERFIELD is the *BY RECENT NATIONAL SURVEY largest-selling cigarette.* ZACHARY SCOTT Famous University of Texas . Alumnus, says: ~ ‘*T have always smoked Chesterfields and I know that you’ll like them, too.’ Soe STARRING IN “GUILTY BYSTANDER” A LAUREL FILMS, INC. EDMUND L. DORFMAN PROD. RELEASED BY FILM CLASSICS, INC, ADMINISTRATION-LIBRARY BUILDING UNIVERSITY OF TEXAS