eo Page Two ———. “THE COLLEGE NEWS ”~ “PHE COLLEGE NEWS - (Founded in 1914) Published weekly during the College Year (excepting during Thanksgiving, Christmas and Easter Holidays, and during examination weeks) in the interest of Bryn Mawr College at the Maguire Building, Wayne, Pa., and Bryn Mawr College. Gn St { i FORTRLY C ) 1921 a) aS RG Assan The College News is fully protected by copyright.° Nothing that appears in it may be reprinted either wholly or in part without wrircen pei mission of the Editor-in-Chief. « . 5 c=) ’ ° Editor-in-Chief Copy Editor ~ SALtiz, JoNgs, °34 Chara FRANCES GRANT, °34 News: Editor JANET MARSHALL, °33 “pera, CLrws, *33 ‘ELIZABETH HANNAN, '34, Sports Editor SALLY Howe, °35 Editors ‘ Nancy Hart, °34-~ * GERALDINE RHoaps, °35 CoNSTANCE ROBINSON, ‘34 Business _Manager Subscription’ Manager MaBeEL .MEEHAN, °33 ELEANOR YEBAKEL, °33 Assistants CarOLINeE Bero, °33 DoroTHy KALBACH, “34 SUBSCRIPTION, $2.50 MAILING PRICE, $3.00 SUBSCRIPTIONS MAY BEGIN AT ANY TIME Post Office - hounds will make their kill, but it is also immature. ‘should be able to pass every course she’takes, and if she does not, it is ‘with intelligent resignation, accepting our fate, and devoting our best Entered as second-class matter at the Wayne, Pa., a Bacchanalia With the prospect of the next two weeks and their attendant difficulties before-us;-we-rise-once-more-to-plead-for-an- intelligent atti- tude toward exams and their numerical outcome. It is difficult not to tremble, like a frightened rabbit against.the day when the pursuing Exams form part of our education and they cannot come as a surprise to anyone. Since October we have been doing our work, or have not been doing it, as the case may be, fully cognizant of the final reckoning to come. There is no reason to regard exams as fabrications of thé devil caleulated solely to upset our digestions and. derange our minds. Everyone in college her fault and not that of the system. The semi-annual rebellion against exams which sweeps the campus reveals an immaturity and lack of courage which is disheartening. Our screams of rage and pain serve only to reduce our effectiveness at the crucial moment and interrupt the mental processes of our friends. Exams are as inevitable as the change of seasons; we have encountered them before and the majority of us will do so again.. Therefore, let us face, the coming two weeks efforts to doing our mentality the most credit with the least weeping and tearing of hair. When the marks. are posted the usual wild scramble to see what we got and who got more than we did will undoubtedly ‘oceur. Bryn Mawr students have espoused the theory that marks are the supreme indieation of brains and accomplishment. They get a certain amount of vicarious pleasure out of splitting hairs, and out of finding out as much as possible about other people’s marks. It is a form of morbid curiosity that keeps students rooted to the spot before the lists of marks long after they have found their own numerical mental capacity. This Bryn Mawr characteristic is lamentable; it is also apparently incurable. During examinations Bryn Mawr devotes itself to the worship of marks, and fo what end? No one is made more happy, and many are made less so; no one is inspired to work harder or more intelligently. The college must have some outlet for its pent-up hysteria and the posting of marks constitutes an appropriate occasion for a numerical baccha- nalia: As the ancient women ran wild through the mountains of Greece, just so do the Bryan Mawr students rush screaming through the halls of Taylor. We are not suggesting that this ancient and well- loved custom be abandoned, for we have no desire to occupy the role of a voice erying in the wilderness. Bryn Mawr will go on down through the ages pursuing its infantile pleasures undisturbed by our As a small child must have his electrie train, so must a, We merely recognize the immutabil- invective. Bryn Mawr girl have her marks. ity of it all, and regret it. t 4 The Animal Kingdom Freshman Show is a long way off, but while class passions are still slumbering and definite preparations forbidden, it might be well. to reflect on the extremes to which rivalry over Those whose memory extends back so far, will recall that last year Merion Green became the scene of a near riot, several private homes were invaded, and harmless visitors were trailed while inspecting the dormitories and admiring the library portraits. Nothing was unfair, not even surveillance of the show-case, because there’ were no rules. This year, since there was no Patade Night, all youthful exuber- ance will be saved. for the Freshman Animal. Who knows what ex- cesses may not be perpetrated in the traditional struggle next month ? Class spirit may be mistaken for Bolshevism, suits may be brought for battery and assault, distinguished lower classmen may be arrested for conspiracy. The only crime of which they will not be suspected is pacifism. To avert such possibilities, we suggest that a committee of class officers undertake to formulate Freshman Show rules similar to those governing Parade Night. All activity concerning the aniimal should participate, two-thirds of the freshmen should be required to know the song, and some restriction should be placed on the amount of pay sical violence permitted. _ The annual game of hide-and- suk is ‘admittedly iitacitie. and possible even childish, but it is great fun, and one of the things in college which one would not like to miss. - Accordingly, lest this pleasant sport degenerate, for want of a few simple rules, into bitter warfare, we urge that some such pro Is be nape upon as those advocated the animal may Kad} ~ THE LOBSTER QUADRILLE “Won’t you work a little faster,” saia the girl across the table— “I’m afraid I can’t oblige you, this is as-fast as I am able, For my lobster’s a bit lively: he likes to loop-the-loop—” I know! , But can’t you see that. he shortly will be soup? And there’s nothing I dislike so much—in my naivete— As slimy soup—especially when it’s nowhere near to Friday.” yy OB, ‘So she pinced him with her pliers, and he Mpped a weary claw As she pried into his. insides for the contents of his maw, And cut up his intestines into little juicy bits, To please her tete-a-tete companion, who was now engaged in fits Of a most disgraceful nature: ag the ‘ latter sadly eyed The mangled, murdered denizens of the deep formaldehyde. She undulated to her feet and writh- ed across the floor, With airy little flitterings she ia out by the door, Shepassed--clean-out-of--Dalton,and went rolling on the green, And nevermore since then hag our heroine been seen; But her last words are extant, farther from Biology I ever can attain to be, the nearer I to sanity.” “The The lobster is departed, he reigned two weeks as despot; Bryn Mawr is glad — let lobsters lie!—and raise a “Requiescat.”’ Campusnoop. A FREE SOUL Vunce on a time der war In die Halle of Bryn Mawr Ein general Brechen-Aus- Nein, nein—nichts com der Haus— Aber mit ein rote Rash Das macht die Fraulein rasch Zu rennen an die Nurse For Better or for Worse. Sie sagten dass sie waren exposet An die Magd nun so geroset; Ganz die Inf sein Schrecken dringt Als sie vom der Doktor Shrinkt; Aber sie allen waren gedickt Und endlich waren aus geschickt, Sie rompen nun mit feindlich Glee Outside—around die Infirmarie! - . —Merionette. FRAGMENTS FROM “ALICE IN CHEMISTRY LAND,” OR; THROUGH THE SEP- ARATORY FUNNEL Sensuality What fragrance of perfumes. steals over my senses; What sweetest. of noises assails my ear! "Tis the odor of aniline as it con- denses, *Tis the bubbling of yeast now changing to beer. a * ae Reality This’ heap of fine glistering flakes— what can it be? What wizardly power has now be- come man’s? : Can this be pure gold dust I see here before mey |. So ttred? ; No; friend—it’s picric; look at my hands.” cakes iv just * * ' Hypnos That rushing of waters, that sibilant . hiss, Can lull one to rest with ‘hypnotic seduction; Ah, how to extol the sweet, somnolent bliss Iriduced by the sound of filtration by suction? ‘ es : nN ' Revenge If you loathe a person, and for him or her ; In search of slow tortures you o’er the world seek, will : ae ; TY yer find better than this?— ‘be limited to the campus, juniors and se-iors should be forbidden to}: eee ee ne ae aver Distilling destructively hast’t an equal. ~~ —-Adamant Eve. _ SPRING FEVER. Anent the scarlet fever curse Things could be a whole lot worse, Those who can’t pass their “Dick” test is Get confined to bt and rest— | In’ other courses—but no matter WITS END We’re not complaining— —THE MAD HATTER. IN PHILADELPHIA ‘Lheatrcs Broad: The theatre returns to the Sweci, simple, and romantic. with A Story of Love, with Dorothy Hall and Kenneth MacKenna, the dramatization of the Eu-opean novel, Peep Show— a purely romantic story ef a girl’s life. Just what we soured moderns need. Garrick: Henry. Hull continues to gambol and: creak through Spring- time For Henry—a comedy farce which is really funny—also it’s cheer- ful to. think that somewhere it’s springtime for someone. Forrest: Green Pastures, the one and only, which no one should miss. Coming Chestnut: January 30, Counsellor- at-Law, with Paul Muni. The saga, with appropriate variations, of the rise of a lawyer. Garrick: January 31, Uday Shan- Kar and a group of Hindu dancers presenting a “daring repertoire.” We saw this crew in Europe and rise to say that they are atrocious—not even amusing, let alone artistic. Forrest: “February 6, Of Thee J Sing. The -Pulitzer prize-winning musical satire on American politics, with original New York cast. Broad: February 6, Whistling in the Dark—a new comedy of unknown traditions with Edward Childs Car- penter and Louis Gross. Music—Academy of Music Philadelphia Orchestra: — Friday, January 27, at 2.30 P. M., and Sat- urday, January 23, at 8.20 P. M. Is- say Dobrowen will conduct and Ye- hudi Menuhin will be the soloist. Pro- gram; : Dvorak ....“New World” Symphony Beethoven, Concerto in D Major, Violin and Orchestra. Movies Aldine: Coming Friday—the three Barrymores in Rasputin and the Empress. The tale of the mad monk who ruled the Romanoffs. All seats reserved—two shows daily. Recom- mended purely on the basis of our Barrymore passion, Europa: Louise, The authentic well done. Boyd: Ruth Chatterton in Frisce Jenny—a throw-back to Madame X— Queen of Prussia. story of her life— the tale of a street-walker, and the on she raised never to know her. Mother love combines with the earth- quake to make a fair picture. Fox: Edmund Lowe and Victor McLaglen in Hot Pepper, a New York comedy, about Park Avenue papas, hotcha queens, and “the rear-admiral of rum-row.” Very funny, but not at all original. Stantem: Boris Karloff goes on put- ting bad ideas into little children’s heads in The Mummy. The tale of a well-buried prince who bounced back 3000 years later to search for his lost love in a most ungentlemanly way. Not as good a thriller as it should be—but* has its moments. Stanley: An authentic picture of prison life, in which a plea is made for the honor system and less brutal- ity—Twenty Thousand Years in Sing- Sing. Not very pleasant. Keith’s: The Unwritten Law—a mystery drama with Greta Nissen, Lew Cody, Louise Fazenda and Skeets Gallagher. - With that.__cast there should be -plenty of mystery—but we question the drama. Karlton: Eddie Cantor bull 'fights and puts his foot in his mouth gen- erally in The Kid From Spain.. Fairly: funny. Earle: Friday. Carole Lombard in a “knock down and drag out” ro- T emon: No More Orchids. Good for its type. Fox: Friday. Face in the Sky, the tale of a romantic young sign- painter and a country girl. Some- what asinine. Coming Locust Street Theatre: February 2. Noel Coward’s famous Cavalcade —the screen version’ with Diana Wynward and Clive Brook. The saga} of a British family from 1900 to the present day.~a A film everyone should see. ; Local se rom Ardmore: Wednesday and Thare- day, James Dunn and Boots Mallory| (Ci ni on- Page Three) |put on a show all its own. News of the New York Theatres Design For Living with Noel Cow- ard and the Lunts, opened last night before an enthusiastic audience, and once more we have a goal to pursue clear-eyed. We are going to see that play, if we have to turn into a clothes’ moth to do it. Noel Coward’s first nights have not always been successful, nor has. his path to glory been devoid of thorns. He entered upon his stage career in England.at the tender age of twelve, not because he was talent- ed, but because his family was finan- cially embarrassed. He batted about. the provinces in -everything imagin- able, including Chdrley’s Aunt, until the war ‘broke out. Returning from abroad he appeared ‘in several plays and wrote’ The Vortex. When the: time came to produce that opus, no manager would buy it, and Mr. Cow- ard, backed by Michael. Arlen, put it on independently. The Vortex. was greeted with enthusiasm, but such was not the case with Sirocco and Home Chat. On those occasions the gallery threw all manner of flora and fauna, and raised healthy voices in open derision. Even the orchestra patrons joined in, and the audience However, Mr. Coward soon learned the likes ‘and dislikes of the public and has not had a failure for many moons. Playwriting class, please note—and prepare for a long, hard struggle be- fore attaining the heights. The theatre in the dear city is undergoing its usual January decline and there is not much going on. Dear old Tallulah Bankhead starts Eorsak- ing All Others in Wilmington next week; Jimmy Durante, Hope Wil- liams and Lupe Velez are in rehear- sals for Strike Me Pink; and the Guild is getting ready to launch two more productions simultaneously. The first one will not be This Side Idol- atry, by Talbot Jennings, as origin- ally announced, but George O’Neil’s cycle of one-act dramas, American Dream. Along with this trilogy about three periods in our history and their tragedies et al., will come Both Your Houses, by Maxwell Anderson. Pardon My English, which was taken off the boards for revision af- ter its Philadelphia engagement, opened last Friday in a blaze of glory with George Gershwin conducting his own music, and everyone gamboling happily around. Also A Good Wom- an, Poor Thing, with Irene Purcell, closed a one-week’s run on Saturday, That animal opened in Philadelphia during Christmas and the majority of the theatre critics, both official and unofficial, declared it was a ‘worthy piece”y,and prophesied great things for it. ¥ooks like mistakes can issue from even the center of the universe. The present plan is to revise it and put it back in the spring. The way producers take failures- before-their-time off the boards “for revision” has always amused us. It reminds us of the _ not-so-popular young thing who excuses herself to go upstairs to powder her ‘nose and then never comes back. Most plays never return after being revised, and it has always been our secret convic- tion that they are thrown in the. ash- heap as soon as a dignified exit has been. achieved through the theatrical back door. Maybe not—watch for A Good Woman in the spring, and if ‘it doesn’t show..up, mark up one for us, as against all the black marks we’ve got. College Choir to Sing Parsifal With Orchestra One of Dr. Stokowski’s ambitions has been to give a concert version of Parsifal in its entirety without cuts. In this connection Parsify will be given at the Academy of Wusic, Philadelphia, on Friday, March 31st; Saturday, April 1st, and Monday, April 3d, by the Philadelphia Orches- tra, with members of choral societies of Philadelphia and various other groups drawn from nearby colleges. In order that the complete work may be presented each concert will be devoted to a different act. The whole of the College Choir of 54 members has been invited to take part and will sing the chorus of “Flower Maidens” at the concert on Saturday, April 1st | (8.20 P. M.), when the entire second act will be given. : “a. Rehearsals w wens Collec Choi commenced last week, m